Thursday, February 21, 2008

People losing their damn minds #23

Lemme explain how teaching works: educational professionals profess their enthusiasm for "the kids" largely in inverse proportion to their actual experience of being with thirty of them in an enclosed space for most of the day. So, for example, senior management are generally much more favourably disposed towards "our young people" than real teachers but can still on occasion get pissed off with them because despite their best efforts, they can't avoid bumping into the odd one from time to time. Even more enthusiastic are lecturers in teacher training colleges who love the kids so much they fucked off into what is laughingly called academia at the first available opportunity. But even these never-have-beens can't match the people who actually run the show for sheer divorced-from-reality lunacy, as can be witnessed here:
"Teachers should not be afraid of saying they "love" the children they work with, according to two of Scotland’s most influential figures in young people’s lives.

Margaret Doran, Glasgow City Council’s head of education and social work, and Kathleen Marshall, the Commissioner for Children and Young People, argued that love was an important factor in working successfully with children."
Ah, but where to begin?
Schools that were genuinely inclusive, Ms Doran said, were "the ones that absolutely love the kids; it’s an unconditional love, and it’s special".
Ah, but where to begin?
"Mrs Marshall spoke about a colleague who believed that professionals’ discomfort about articulating love for children in their care stemmed from a "poverty of the English language. Love is a very challenging word.""
So is "restraining order". Ok, so that's two words. You might have thought the 'discomfort' was provoked by the unbridled lunacy on display here? No - it's a linguistic phenomenon, apparently. The audience was not universally receptive, it seems:
"They made their comments at a leadership event for primary school heads last week, creating a talking point that dominated the coffee breaks and split delegates into two clear camps."
These "two clear camps" are the ones into which teachers are habitually divided: 1) the relatively sane 2) the frankly a bit mental. The former group had some misgivings...
"Some were uncomfortable with talking about love for pupils, believing it could be misinterpreted."
"Could be" being something of an understatement here. I trust that Ms Doran et al haven't yet traveled so far to the outer-reaches of insanity that they think this love-fest would be appropriate in a secondary school? I mean, if you said to a male pupil, "I love you, man", this might be misconstrued, to say no more than that. If, on the other hand, you were to declare your 'special love' to female pupils who looked like this...

...I think people could reasonably assume that you're in the wrong line of work.

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