"The latest series of Big Brother attracted its biggest opening night audience, according to unofficial overnight figures.I confess to being one of these 8.1 million - the reason being a former pupil at the school I used to teach in is on it. He's the really screechy, annoying one with the Glasgow accent.
The Channel 4 reality show drew a peak audience of 8.1 million viewers as the new crop of housemates were unveiled."
Way before my time, thank goodness - but I'm reliably informed he was like that as a pupil.
Having him in your class - how annoying would that be?
Nails scraping across a blackboard annoying, I'd imagine. He makes the other contestants look unannoying by comparison.
But they're not. For instance, one of them went into the 'Big Brother' room or whatever it's called and started going on about how terrible it was that the house couldn't accommodate the obviously arduous business of her waterproof mascara removal - in distressed tones that would have been appropriate if she'd just discovered Big Brother had strangled and dismembered her cat or something.
It is sometimes suggested that Big Brother is indicative of how nice and tolerant today's youth are. I think this is true - they are certainly nicer and more tolerant than me. If I were in the Big Brother house and there was, say, a chainsaw lying about - there'd be a bloodbath, let me tell you.
Now that would be entertainment.