Tuesday, May 24, 2005


We all have them - even us right-on liberal lefties. For instance, after a wee trip to the Uni swimming pool (damned handy; just across the road from the school) I realised I have a really disturbingly high number of prejudices that have to do with people's hair. Amongst those I treat with immediate and unreasonable suspicion include:

1) Bald men (I suspect they resent me for still having all my own hair and a couple of baldies I know have actually been honest enough to admit this. It just recently occurred to me that I have no close friends that are bald).

2) Bald women (unless 1 and 2 have alopecia or are getting chemotherapy - I'm prejudiced, not evil).

3) Men with pony tails. I think folk say to themselves, "Hey - I can look cool and save money on haircuts". No, you look like a complete berk - get your bloody haircut, or at least take the tie-back off.

4) Young men with beards - especially if this involves a) goatees b) overly neatly-trimmed facial hair c) excessively large side-burns. I mean, I can't bring myself to read this blog that I've linked to because of the ever-present face of the author with a beard that is too damn neat.

5) Skinheads. I know they originated with white boys imitating the rude-boy haircuts but latterly, it was the hair-do of choice for members of the NF.

6) Sort of skinheads but with a wee fringe bit left long at the front. It doesn't look so threatening - just absolutely ridiculous. Someone needs to tell them that this look originated with the female skinhead.

7) Mullets. You don't see many of them thankfully, but they keep threatening to make a come-back. See, the problem with eighties nostalgia is that it's people that are about my age that run advertising agencies now and there's an evil conspiracy afoot to re-inflict the putrid fashions of that era. The eighties sucked - and not just because of Thatcher and Reagan. They were also very evil on the musical, artistic and fashion front - my deranged thoughts about which can and will fill an entirely new post coming soon.

8) Men with long hair but it doesn't have any layers in it and it's the same length all the way round. You look like a girl - get your haircut!

9) Men with too much body-hair.

10) Women with too much body-hair.

Sorry - I'm actually going insane. Please interpret this as a cry for help. I'm off to the pub now.

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