Thursday, January 25, 2007

As if work wasn't hard enough...

You get confronted with signs like this one:

Which makes the day just a little more shit than it was already. I mean, "make choices you can count on"! What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Who says to themselves, "I would make that decision, were it not for the fact that I'm not sure I'll be able to count on it in the future"? No-one. Exactly.

Then there's this rather strained acronym. It's really getting on my tits:

This one is true to the 'ethos' of the school. Those without any discernible talent or intellect, whether staff or pupils, are indeed valued highly - as are those who might be unfortunate enough to have no skin. Absolutely no discrimination against the skinless goes on here, let me tell you - regardless of what year it is.

However this business of celebrating the gorgeous mosaic of our diversity has limits, y'know. This life is fine but should you happen to have that disease that is euphemistically designated "non-RC", I'm afraid you're going to hell where your worm will not die, nor will your fire be quenched. Sounds a bit harsh maybe, but there it is. I'll see you there.


james higham said...

I sincerely hope you ripped the signs down and stomped on them. And on Rabbie's day too:

"Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face, Great chieftain o' the Puddin-race! Aboon them a' ye tak your place, Painch, tripe, or thairm: Weel are ye wordy of a grace As lang's my arm."

Hat tip Colin

dearieme said...

The first one means "Buy an abacus" and the second says "I'm a patronising git".

Will said...

Tear down the statues! Overthrow the fuckers!

Stop moving towards a liberal/conservative frame of reference! (it'll do you no good).

And that.

KB Player said...

Reason and
Sense to

Shout On said...

Where I work we just have one ragged piece of paper blue-tacked to the wall that states:

"Beatings will continue until moral improves".

Evidence suggest beatings need to be upped at your school and your signs replaced.

David J said...

Don't get mad, get over to fd's flickr toys and make your own motivational poster

Here's my chip butty 'Make Healthy Choices' poster.

west coaster said...

So this is what they mean by the unique "ethos". Maybe they bought them in the Pound Shop.

The Editor said...

How do you draw the line with 'diversity'?
Can Hitler be respected as a nice enough guy once you got to know him? Was it just some of his beliefs that were a bit screwy?

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