Bum deal for ex who glued man's genitals

From, yes, the Guardian:

"A US man is suing a former girlfriend for damages after having his genitals stuck to his stomach in a superglue and nail varnish attack more than five years ago.
Kenneth Slaby of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, was at the home of Gail O'Toole on the evening of May 7 2000 when the incident, which he said left him "scared and puzzled", occurred.

The two had dated during the previous year but only started seeing each other again at the start of that May. Mr Slaby says Ms O'Toole invited him to take a nap.

According to the lawsuit, he woke "to a strong burning sensation" in his genital area and found red and blue nail polish in his hair. Mr Slaby is seeking $30,000 (£17,000) damages.

Superglue had been used to fix his penis to his abdomen and to stick his buttocks together. An obscene comment had been painted in nail polish on his back.

Ms O'Toole, the suit claims, told Mr Slaby her actions were in return for the break up of their 10-month relationship shortly before Christmas. Mr Slaby had to walk one mile for help, where he met a police officer who took him to hospital. His lawyer, Grey Pratt, told Westmoreland county court it "was not some petty domestic squabble."

In June 2000, Ms O'Toole pleaded guilty to assault and served six months' probation.

Mr Slaby filed a civil suit for damages in September 2001, alleging battery, assault, and intentional infliction of emotional distress.

"I woke up in severe pain," Mr Slaby told the court, according to local press reports.

"I felt like my groin was on fire and I had a severe headache. I looked at my head and it was blue, purple, and red. I was more worried about my groin because I was all stuck together."

Ms O'Toole's attorney, Chuck Evans, said it was a consensual act and said Mr Slaby had suffered no permanent damage. "This is a case that should have been left in the bedroom," he told the court.

He said Mr Slaby "just laughed quite a bit", but then the couple argued and Ms O'Toole told him to find his own way back to Pittsburgh."

This has to be a spoof, surely? Gail O'Toole - honestly!